Crispin's Day
by Amaria Anna
Summary: AU Cloud never expected that being home from the war would be almost as hard as surviving it had been. Now living with a disability and memories he can't leave behind. It will take a fellow veteran to help him find his way again. CloudxLeon
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note—I am very new to the world of fanfiction writing and am desperately seeking an experienced beta to help me with this story if you are interested please send me a private message. And any critiques will be put to good use. Thank you!

"_He that shall live this day, and see old age,  
>Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbors,<em>

_And say 'To-morrow is Saint Crispian.'  
>Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars,<br>And say 'These wounds I had on Crispian's day.'  
>Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot, <em>

_But he'll remember, with advantages,  
>What feats he did that day." <em>

– from _Henry V by _William Shakespeare

Crispin's Day

Chapter 1: Forgotten

The war was over. For most people, life went on almost as if it had never happened. It was easier to forget that for the last few years that young men had been marching off to battle to protect their families and neighbors than it was to recognize the poor remains of those same young men. Cloud watched from the window as a woman pulled her little girl protectively away from the path of a blinded, battle-scarred veteran. Shaking his head sadly, Cloud continued to wipe down the bar. He wished he were surprised by the blatant lack of respect people showed to his former brothers-in-arms, but he wasn't. When Cloud had first returned home, he had realized all too soon that the very people he and his fellow soldiers had bled for would rather pretend that they didn't exist.

"Everything okay?" Tifa asked from the kitchen door.

Cloud nodded. "Next time you place an order be sure to get us more vodka. We are already starting to run low again."

The brunette bit her lip, but didn't say ask what was really bothering him. They both knew he wouldn't really answer. Feeling guilty, Cloud forced a smile. "Flip a coin for closer?"

"Oh, no way!" Tifa cried with her hands on her curvacious hips. "I closed last night and I have a bubble bath calling my name. You and Axel are just going to have to do all of that hard work on your own."

"You'd really make a cripple close?" Cloud teased. The instant the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them.

Tifa's smile melted from her face. "Is your...Are you in pain again?"

"I'm sorry. It was just a joke," he told her flatly. "Not much of one, I guess."

"All right then. I guess I will go make sure all of the prep work is done in the kitchen."

As he watched her retreating form disappear through the swinging doors, Cloud swore under his breath.

Cloud was truly grateful for Tifa. She'd been his best friend for longer than he could remember and without her, Cloud wouldn't have had much of anything after the war. He wasn't sure when the idea had actually taken the shape of a bar, but the two of them had talked since they were kids about how someday they would open up their own business together. The idea of being their own bosses appealed the the rebellious youngsters. Tifa had made Cloud swear when they were teens that they would save their pennies and invest in a place the first chance they got. Before he left for the army, Cloud had given her his signing bonus and promised to send what he could from his pay. He'd never imagined that Tifa would have been able to do so much while he was away. In six years, Tifa literally built something out of nothing. She purchased a near condemned building and did most of the renovations one stage at a time with very little help. Amazingly, Tifa even converted the upstairs floors into apartments for the both of them. While many soldiers came home to crumbling homes and fractured families, Cloud came home to find that he owned half of one of the busiest establishments in town and a new flat.

Within an hour, though the street lights weren't even on yet, a modest crowd had arrived. Most of them Cloud at least recognized as having been in a time or two. The regulars shuffled their was up to their usual seats, and without taking any orders, Cloud began to pour. Something about the routine of it was almost comforting. He knew these men and there stories better than most people did their own families. True, Cloud didn't look forward to listening to middle aged men whining into their beers about how no one really understood their troubles every night, but such was the role of a bartender.

By eleven, that "modest crowd" had turned to a near mob. Every seat in the place was filled and many more patrons stood in clusters. Cloud moved quickly pouring drinks with a practiced deftness that few bartenders managed to master. From the corner of his eye he spotted Tifa racing about the room delivering all kinds of fried bar fare from the kitchen. Time flew when they were busy. Cloud didn't have time to spare to look at the clock let alone wish he were done. As hours passed and bottles were drained, Cloud saw Tifa less and less. They spoke little during their shifts. Both were too busy seeing to customers, but occasionally Tifa would sly make her way behind the bar to check on him. She claimed she was checking on the sales but Cloud knew better.

Last call came as a relief. The bar had emptied slightly by then, and Cloud was glad to see that the remaining patrons were nursing the final sips of their drinks. He tossed a towel over his shoulder and leaned against the counter. Cloud had made sure to keep his expression stoically neutral as Tifa took off for the night, but now that she was gone he let the mask slip just a tad. Absolute agony radiated from his left ankle and there wasn't a damn thing to be done about it. The best he could do was get back to work and pray that things went quickly. Axel took care of the kitchen and the dishwasher would come put the chairs up, so all Cloud really had to worry about was cleaning up the bar area and washing the glassware. Before he could get too focused on his work, a familiar female form came into view.

"I knew things were too damn easy," Cloud muttered to himself as he limped to the other end of the bar. He wanted as much distance between them as possible but he knew that wouldn't mean much to her.

"Cloud!" she called out. He heard her footsteps moving toward him but refused to turn. "Cloud, please! Just talk to me. Answer a few questions and I will leave you alone, I swear"

Pivoting on his good leg, Cloud finally faced his adversary. She was pretty—in a girl-next-door kind of way—with long, golden brown hair and soft rosy skin, but it was the desperation in her blue eyes that made Cloud want to run. Aerith might look like a sweet young girl, but she had the tenacity of a pitbull.

"I told you last time that I don't want to talk to you. Are you really too stupid to grasp that?" he ground out sullenly.

Aerith crossed her arms over her chest. "You know something about Zack that you're not telling me."

"Just leave me the hell alone. I don't remember anything solid about that day, and the bits and pieces I do remember, I just want to forget," Cloud replied looking away. "If you have any kind of understanding in that head of yours, just walk your scrawny ass out of this bar and don't come back."

"I understand that you are a selfish, jack ass." Aerith pulled on her coat and set a business card on the bar. "I'll be back, but in the mean time, if you decide to do the right thing just call me at that number or stop by."

Cloud remained silent as he watched Aerith leave the bar. Only after she was gone did he pick up the card. It was the same as all the others she had left him: a white card with a pink flower engraved for Gainsborough Floral Shoppe. He tossed it in the garbage without hesitation.

The bar was clean enough he decided. Whatever else needed done would wait until tomorrow. As he hobbled back to the kitchen, he cursed with each step. Before he made it to his destination, Axel emerged wiping wet hands on his apron. Axel was the one employee they had managed to find who pull any sort of real weight in the bar. The slender redhead eyed him curiously. "I'm all finished in the back, boss. Need me to finish up the bar?" he offered.

"No, I'll be in a little early tomorrow anyway." Cloud hated that he was tempted to let the kid do it, and he would rather deal with the pain than give in.

The one and only thing Cloud hated about the building Tifa had bought was the lack on an elevator. Twenty-six steps led up to his apartment. That may not sound like too much to most people but for Cloud it was an almost interminable trial. He grasped the railing so tightly his knuckles turned a ghostly white. His left ankle was sending white hot shards of anguish through his entire side with each movement. By the time he reached he top of the stairs, he was almost too tired to pick up his feet, but he was mere steps away from his door and he forged on.

Cloud didn't breath easily until he let himself sink into the overstuffed chair in his living room. He was mere seconds away from any semblance of relief, but it was always hard to face what was about to come. Cloud stripped off his boots and then began to slide off his black jeans. With one practiced motion Cloud then did what he did every night: he removed the prosthetic from the stump of his left leg. The stump itself was only a few inches of oddly shaped flesh with a long jagged scar at its end. After a long day behind the bar, the skin now revealed was an angry chaffed red. Biting down on his lip, Cloud began to gently massage it as he'd been shown in rehab. He was lucky that night in that the phantom pain in his ankle seemed to let up as his fingers worked. It didn't seem quite fair that his leg was gone but he could still feel such pain from it. He reasoned that the flesh from his severed limb had rotted away somewhere and that the pain should have rotted with it, but unfortunately that wasn't the way it worked.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's note- Thanks for reading and thank you even more if you review. I am still desperately seeking a beta please let me know if you are interested!

Chapter 2

Leon pulled his jacket tighter around him against a sudden gust of cold wind. Though it was still only early September, a cold front had moved into Traverse Town bringing with it the promise of a long winter in the months to come. Leon found he didn't mind the cold so much. It was easier to remind himself that he was far from home when the fall and winter set in. Though Radiant Gardens was far from tropical, it was slightly warmer and a bit more humid. In fact, Leon couldn't remember ever wearing a coat so early in the year when he was home. Even if he couldn't see the differences, it was nice to know they were there

When the tip of his cane reached the curb, Leon tilted his head sideways and listened for traffic, but before he could discern if it was safe or not, he heard a voice calling him.

"Hey Leon! Wait up for me!" The voice was soon followed by the graceless, clomping sounds of a young teenager running up to greet him. When she closed the distance, Leon could almost make out a vague shadow of the girl out of his right eye. "You didn't wait for me at the bus stop again," Yuffie whined as she caught her breath.

"I can make it home from work on my own, you know," he admonished her. The gruffness of his tone was belied by the smile on his face.

"I know but I like walking home with you. I mean what would happen if I was attacked by thugs?" she asked as she guided his hand to her arm.

Leon chuckled and shook his head. "You've been studying martial arts since you could walk, and I very much so doubt I would be any help at all in a fight."

"But I know you can look intimidating. Just give them the look you gave to Sora when he asked to borrow your cane to get the ball out of the neighbor's tree," she told him with unabashed honesty.

There was something about the excitable teen that Leon couldn't help but admire. While most people avoided him, Yuffie had thought nothing of inviting herself in to his apartment the first day he'd moved in. It was oddly assuring to him that at least one person didn't side step the obvious. Yuffie never failed to notice that Leon was blind and that his face was a scarred wreck. She also never took a single second to feel sorry for him either.

"Uh-oh," Yuffie said as she came to a dead stop a half block from their building.

"What is it?"

"Aerith's shop is closed early again," she told him as they began walking again.

Aerith Gainsborough lived in the same building that they did and ran the flower shop next door. Leon hadn't dealt with the florist much, but he did know that the young woman had been engaged to a soldier who died in the war. A common enough story these days, but Aerith's fiance had been denied any sort of decoration by the military. As pathetic as his career had been, even Leon had a box full of useless metal and ribbon stashed away. The idea that a "true hero" would come home without a single medal for his valor had stirred up all sorts of rumors in town. Leon supposed that the business might actually be suffering from the talk, but he was almost certain that it was more often than not closed because Aerith spent her time looking for answers. He couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

After saying goodbye to Yuffie and promising to meet her at the bus stop the next day, Leon found himself ensconced inside the never changing walls of his closet sized apartment. He hung his cane and jacket by the door and took measured steps toward his tiny kitchen. The very first thing Leon had done when he'd moved in was memorized the whole apartment. Every single thing inside had a very specific spot and things almost never were rearranged. That kind of organization allowed Leon a type of freedom he didn't have in the outside world. The simple act of making a pot of coffee had become almost cathartic in a way. It reassured him that he was no longer the helpless kid who had entered rehab four years ago.

Later that night, Leon found himself lying awake in his bed. It wasn't anything unusual, just annoying. He rolled from one side to the other and back again numerous times before deciding to let the sound of the television lull him to sleep. Grabbing the remote from the nightstand, he turned the device on without bothering to notice what channel it was on. Leon hadn't watched much television in the past and now he only used it to fill the silent void in his apartment. After he listened for almost an hour as a documentary narrator droned on about the mating habits of yaks, Leon gave up on sleep for a while.

Leon threw on a pair of jeans and grabbed his jacket on the way out the door. Without even unfurling his cane, he found his way to the front steps of his apartment building. The night air was perfect for a stroll, but Leon instead took a seat on the steps and pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. Despite the health risks, a late night smoke was still one of Leon's favorite things. It was nice to just sit and listen. In the distance, he could hear the echoing howl of a siren moving through the streets between tall buildings. It must be near the industrial district, he decided as the sound turned to the east. Every so often, Leon would hear a car rolling by. This part of Traverse Town didn't see too much action at night. Just as he finished his cigarette, Leon heard the distinct click of high heels on cement. He wondered wryly if a hooker had gotten lost on her way back from the red light district.

"She'd probably charge me double," he murmured to himself as stood.

The woman must not have noticed him before he moved, because she gave a startled yelp. "Leon, you scared me!" she cried before letting out a long sigh.

"Aerith?" he asked barely recognizing her voice.

"Yes, it's just me," she confirmed softly with a touch of rawness to her usual smooth contralto. "I didn't expect anyone would be out here so late."

"Just came out for a smoke. Late night?"

"I...I just stopped out to see someone. I'm afraid things didn't go very well, though," Aerith admitted. He couldn't be sure, but it almost sounded like she was crying.

Leon should have just said good night and left it at that. Crying women made him feel like he was about to crawl out of his skin. On top of that, he noticed that as she drew nearer to him, Aerith's usual floral scent was masked by the odor of stale smoke and a bit of beer. _Wonderful, _he thought, _drunk and weeping._ He couldn't be sure why, but instead of following his instincts, he suggested, "how about a cup of coffee?"

As Leon held open the door for Aerith, it occurred to him that aside from Yuffie and his landlord, that in his entire time living here he hadn't had a single visitor. The thought made him realize that perhaps he was even more solitary than he had intended to be. Perhaps inviting Aerith in wasn't such a bad thing after all.

"Have a seat on the couch, and I'll make us something. Do you like coffee or tea?"

"Tea," Aerith replied, "though maybe coffee would be better."

"Coffee it is then," Leon said as he began making a pot.

He listened as Aerith settled herself on the ancient, creaking sofa. An awkward silence was setting in, but he wasn't quite sure how to fix that. It had been a long time since Leon had made small talk with anyone. When Yuffie came over, she didn't shut up long enough for him to need to fill any voice. To be honest, even before the war, Leon had never been much of a socialite. Luckily, Aerith filled silence for him.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," he answered.

"I know you don't like to talk about the war, but if someone really needed answers, would you?" she asked shakily.

"I guess so," he agreed warily.

"It's just that it seems the only person who really knows exactly what happened that day refuses to talk to me." Aerith took a deep breath, and Leon could tell the real tears were about to start. "I just don't understand. Zack used to write me letters about how Cloud was his best friend. How can Cloud just sit back and let the military deny that Zack's death even meant anything at all?"

"I'm sure if Cloud did care about Zack that it must be very painful for him," Leon told her vaguely. He found his way to the unoccupied half of the couch managing not to touch Aerith. He drew the line at actually letting her cry on his shoulder.

"But maybe if he'd just talk about it he could find some kind of closure," she sobbed.

Closure. Now there was a word that Leon had heard pretty regularly since his injury. As if putting something in words actually could ease the never ending sense of guilt and shame. He didn't believe in closure. The monsters lurking in the back of his head didn't go away just because he talked about them. Leon had a hunch that this Cloud person might just agree.

Leon sighed. "Aerith, please believe me when I tell you that you can't force someone to reopen wounds for you."

"I can't just let it go. Zack deserves better."

Just as Leon opened his mouth to reply, he heard the telltale hiss coming from his coffeepot. He made a cup with extra sugar for Aerith and left his black. As he handed the mug to Aerith, he could practically feel the weight of her stare. He ignored it and instead focused on the strong tasting brew before him. "Sorry if it's a bit strong," he apologized.

"It's fine," Aerith assured him a bit too quickly. "It's actually quite amazing."

"Really? You like dark roast that much?" he asked sarcastically. Leon had a feeling he knew where this was going.

"No, I mean that you've managed to become so self-sufficient," she told him confirming his intuition. Aerith continued on in a sugar sweet tone. "You've really overcome your challenges. I'm sure a lot of differently-abled veterans could learn from you."

Leon's grip tightened around his mug, and he took drink of coffee to hide his grimace. It never ceased to surprise him that people honestly believed that the term "differently-abled" was acceptable. Leon was blind, not mentally disabled. He was a grown man and functioned like one. He didn't need a pat on the head from some well meaning goody-two-shoes. Taking a breath, Leon tried to let go of some of his frustration. He had realized a long time ago that most people weren't trying to be assholes; they were just ignorant.

"It's getting really late," he said flatly.

"Oh, you're right. I should go," Aerith agreed. "Thank you for the coffee. I feel much better."

The next morning, Leon had practically forgotten all about the florist and her woes. He had a long day at the cannery ahead of him. Leon's job at the cannery wasn't much more than monkey work. He sealed the boxes of canned goods that came off the line and loaded them onto a pallet a few feet behind him. It was back breaking and monotonous, but the paycheck was fair. Combined with his pension from the military, it was enough to pay the bills and to tuck a little aside in preparation for the inevitable.

After finishing his time in rehab, Leon had applied to a job placement program that the military offered for disabled vets that couldn't return to the front. With an already dwindling number of able-bodied men at home, most companies were willing to take applicants that they otherwise would have looked over. But now the war was over. Men who had their eyes and limbs intact were now flooding the job market again. The cannery bosses had been quick to assure their workers that no one would be let just because there was a line outside the employment office that looked a lot better than the battered group in front of them. No, instead the handicapped vets were suddenly called into the front office and let go for the smallest infraction. Thus far, Leon had avoided the ax by working harder and longer than the others, but he wasn't sure how long his luck would hold out.

By the end of his shift, Leon's back was aching and his feet were sore, but he had made it through another day. He made his way to the bus stop down the street just as a light rain began to fall. Instantly, his mind went back to his work locker where his umbrella was hanging. The dilemma at hand left him with two choices: he could walk back to the cannery and risk missing the bus, or he could simply stand in the rain. He felt the face of his watch and debated for only a minute before heading back to the cannery. By the time he made it back, Leon was just in time to hear the bus moving on. Trying desperately not to lose his temper, Leon sat on the bench. He knew the next bus would be by in half an hour, but he had to catch a second bus at the edge of the business district and that bus wouldn't be coming for almost another three hours. It suddenly seemed that his day would be a bit longer than he had thought.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Cloud opened his eyes to a bright shard of light peaking through his blinds and a skull crushing headache. He raked a hand through his disheveled hair as he tried to force away the fogginess from his mind. The clock on the night stand told him it was nearly eleven-thirty. He had managed to sleep for almost six hours, an unusual accomplishment for him. It would have been even more impressive if there wasn't an empty bottle of vodka mocking him from beside the clock. Reaching for his crutches, Cloud pulled himself up and out of bed. He didn't feel like doing a hell of a lot, but he couldn't stand to just lie around in bed. He'd done enough of that in the hospital to last a lifetime.

Cloud made himself a cup of coffee and stood at his counter to drink it. It wasn't worth the hassle to try to maneuver carrying the cup to the table with his crutches. In the rehab center, he could still remember the first time they had discussed "mobility options." He didn't have enough residual limb left to be able to walk without a severe limp and then there was the pain from his mangled hip. The therapist had told him that he would probably still want to use a wheelchair at home, but even now in the privacy of his own home his pride wouldn't let him do it. Instead, he choose to use the crutches, no matter how difficult they made things at times.

A knock sounded at the door as Cloud was pouring a second cup of coffee. "Come on in. It's unlocked," he called out, not bothering to leave his place at the counter.

"Hey there," Tifa said as she let herself in. She eyed Cloud warily. Despite the fact that the bar wasn't open for quite a while, she was dressed in her typical work clothes while Cloud still was wearing only his boxer shorts and t-shirt. Seeing him in his shorts was nothing that would have phased her years ago, but now her gaze seemed to go right to where Cloud's leg should have been.

"Want some coffee?" Cloud offered roughly.

Tifa's eyes finally met Cloud's, and her cheeks started to turn pink. "No, I had some a while ago. I just wanted to stop in and see how things went last night."

"Fine. I sent you a text with the totals when I finished up," he reminded her irritably.

"And thanks for sending it. I was just wondering about the rest of it." Tifa settled herself down on one of the bar stools at his counter. "Axel's been doing well. Don't you think?"

Cloud sat down on the stool beside her. "The rest of the night was fine, and Axel's doing fine. What do you really want?"

"Axel wants to pick up some more hours and maybe bartend a little. I told him to come in a bit early today," she told him looking away. "I was hoping you wouldn't mind helping with the paperwork a bit more."

Cloud nodded silently. He had a feeling that Axel would say something about him leaving early the night before, but hadn't expected Tifa to do something about it so quickly. After all, she'd known where the extra bottles were disappearing to for quite sometime and hadn't said a word to him. "Just tell me what the fuck to do, and I'll be a good little doggie," Cloud assured her caustically.

"Cloud, I just can't... I...I just want to see you happy again."

"Just let it go." Cloud pulled himself up and started toward the bedroom. "I'm going to get dressed. I'll see you down stairs in a bit."

He didn't wait for Tifa's reply. There was nothing she could say that would change anything.

Cloud didn't emerge from his apartment until after three o'clock. He should have come down sooner, but he ended up sitting on his couch with a book sulking—and he was quite aware of it. If Tifa thought he was too stupid to see what was really going on, she was brain dead. He knew that last night wasn't the first night he had left a few extra things for himself the next day, but he reasoned that he had taken care of it just like he said he would. So why did Tifa have her panties in a twist now? Cloud knew there were a lot of things she could call him on. Hell, he wished she would. Instead, she treated him like some kind of invalid child. He missed the days when Tifa would stand up to him.

By the time Cloud reached the bottom of the stairs, he could hear Tifa giggling like a school girl. He rounded the corner to see Tifa using a bar towel to fling water at Axel. For a split second, Cloud felt a wave of jealousy rising in his gut, but he pushed it away. He used to be the person that made her smile like that, but not anymore.

"What still needs done?" He asked without preambled.

"Not much," Tifa replied. "I'll go do the order."

Once he was on his own behind the bar, Cloud found that Tifa had been right. Other than slice fruit, there really wasn't anything left for him to do. There was no way it would take him until the bar opened to cut up lemons and limes. He would have had plenty of time to catch up on the things he had left himself and get all of his opening work done. There was no reason for Axel to butt in. Cloud wiped down the bar for about the tenth time before he noticed someone standing outside.

The stranger was tall and slender with longish brown hair. From behind, Cloud couldn't say if he had been there before or not. Most likely, he was just another drunk waiting for the bar to open. Annoyed, Cloud decided to send him on his way. He was tired of dealing with people's shit. "The bar's not open yet, if that's what you're waiting for," Cloud said coldly.

Upon hearing Cloud's voice, the man's head swiveled toward him revealing a scarred visage and eyes that did not quite meet his. Cloud recognized him as the same man he saw walking by almost every day. The irritation that had swelled in him mere moments before melted away, and he instantly regretted his temper.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't waiting. I was just taking advantage of the awning while it was raining," the stranger explained as he held up his dripping wet umbrella for emphasis. "I'll go back to the bus stop."

"The bus stop?" Cloud asked. He thought for a moment. "I don't think the next bus comes for quite a while."

The dark haired man smiled ruefully. "Not for another couple of hours. I'm just glad it stopped raining."

Cloud looked up at the sky and frowned. Though it wasn't currently raining, he could see a dark line of clouds moving in from the south. As if to confirm his suspicions, a clap of thunder sounded in the distance. "Why don't you come in for a while?"

"I thought you weren't open yet?" the dark haired man asked dubiously.

"Yeah. Well, I really feel like a dick for not realizing you were just trying to keep dry. I was in a shit mood and wanted an excuse to be an asshole, " Cloud admitted. He wasn't sure why he said so much, but he suddenly felt like he needed to explain.

"All right," he agreed as he pulled a folding white cane from his pocked and unfurled it.

There had been some blind men at the same rehab center that he'd gone to, but Cloud wasn't really sure what kind of help—if any he should be offering. The guy walked around the city on his own, so Cloud quickly decided he could probably make it across the bar on his own. "The bar is about fifteen feet dead ahead," he said casually.

"Thanks," the stranger said as he groped for a stool.

"Want a drink?" Cloud asked from behind the bar.

"A beer would be great."

As Cloud poured, he studied the man a bit more. He would have been really handsome, Cloud decided quickly. The scars were mainly centered around his left eye leaving the right side mostly untouched. Cloud noted that the straight nose and high cheekbones gave him a refined look, but his features were too strong to be considered "pretty." At times, his gray eye seemed to almost meet Cloud's appraising gaze. The left side however was a mess. Deep burn scars starting at where his eyebrow should have been cut a searing path over his cheekbone giving the skin the look of melted wax and almost seared his eyelid shut over an eye that was near marble white. Realizing how rude he was being, Cloud forced his gaze away and nudged the frosty cold pint against the back of his patron's hand.

"Thanks again," the brunette repeated. He took a sip and then held out his hand. "My name's Leon, by the way."

"Cloud," he replied as he grasped Leon's hand.

"I didn't even know there were any bars this far out of the cultural district," Leon mused.

"We're the only one," Cloud confirmed. "I think I've seen you around a time or two. Do you work out here?"

"The cannery," Leon answered with a small frown. "I stack boxes all day." 

"Sounds like a blast."

Leon shifted uncomfortably. "Look, I don't mean to keep you from anything you need to do."

"I'm all caught up," Cloud assured him. "I had an unwanted helper monkey this afternoon. So I really have nothing better to do this afternoon."

"And the owner doesn't mind you bringing in random blind men off the street?" Leon asked.

Instantly Cloud felt a bit of his former mood returning. "I'm one of the owners actually."

"Must be nice to own your own business."

"It's not a bad gig. I was in the army while my best friend did most of the start up. All I had to do was open up my damn bank account." Again, Cloud found himself saying more than he had intended to. "Sorry to sound like I'm complaining."

Leon let out a laugh. "I bet you hear more than your fair share of complaining from this side of the bar."

Cloud smiled despite himself. He really couldn't say what it was about this man, but he suddenly felt like talking—maybe not opening up his deepest, darkest secrets, but just talking. It wasn't something he'd done much of for quite some time. The last good conversation he could remember having was with Zack before he died. Since then, everyone walked on eggshells around him or wanted something he wasn't willing to give, but this guy didn't want a damn thing and certainly didn't pity him. It was nice.

"There's probably a saying out there about that," he mused. "If you can't stand the drunken whiners, get out of the god damn bar...or something like that. Who knows maybe someday, I will."

"And do what?" Leon asked. "If you could hypothetically do anything?"

Thinking for a minute, Cloud imagined the motorcycle sitting beneath a cloth in the garage. A sudden bittersweet longing hit him, and he realized that if anyone else had asked he would have lied to them. "Probably open my own motorcycle shop. What about you?"

"I haven't give it that much thought," Leon admitted. "My last dream job didn't exactly work out very well."

Clouded nodded instinctively. He knew that feeling. As a kid, all he had ever wanted was to be the hero. In his childhood daydreams, he had returned home a soldier decorated in ribbons and medals with a whole parade in honor of his valor. Funny how different that dream was from the reality. Suddenly realizing that Leon wouldn't have seen his nod, Cloud pushed away his thoughts and asked: "Is that what happened? Were you a soldier, too?"

"A pilot."

Leon was silent for a moment and cocked his head to the side. "It sounds like it's coming down pretty good again."

"It is," Cloud affirmed. "I think it's supposed to be like this all evening."

"Well, I guess I have learned not to leave my umbrella behind," Leon muttered darkly.

An idea struck Cloud, and he found his eyes drifting to the office door. "Mind waiting here for a minute?"


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note-Thanks for reading and REVIEWING! I have recently adopted a couple of unfinished Harry Potter fics from a friend so I have been splitting my time between them. Sorry for the delay! And also a very big thanks to my friend Sayra for beta'ing this chap for me.

Chapter 4

Leon listened to the retreating sound of Cloud's lopsided steps across the bar. He couldn't help but marvel at the coincidence. No less than sixteen hours ago, he had listened to Aerith's blubbering about this very man. Sighing heavily, he reached for the frosty glass in front of him. Just his luck that the first time in years that he actually was enjoying a chance encounter and he had to run into someone involved in some sort of spat with his neighbor. Leon was damn sure he was staying out of the line of fire between them. He finished his beer just in time to hear Cloud's return.

Instinctively, Leon cocked his head toward the spot he assumed Cloud to be standing in. "Back so soon," he muttered wryly.

Cloud let out a breathy chuckle—one that sounded as unused as his sense of humor. "I just asked my business partner if I could borrow her car."

"Going somewhere?" Leon asked in slight confusion. "I thought you were opening soon?"

"I've still got about an hour to kill, and I thought it would be nice to get out of here for a bit. Want a ride home?" Cloud offered.

Normally, Leon would have declined on sheer principle. He was quite capable of making it home on his own. But Leon had a hunch that Cloud's offer wasn't based on pity nor was it out of any imagined sort of camaraderie from their military service. Cloud was more awkward conversationally than most fifteen year olds Leon knew. There was just something fragile about him beneath the hardened edges. Leon couldn't say why, but he found himself wondering what Cloud would be like if he were more relaxed and less restrained.

Leon stood and collected his cane. "All right then. How much for the beer?"

"I don't feel like opening the register so you get off easy today," Cloud told him casually. "It would probably be easier for you if I brought the car around. The garage is kind of a mess."

"If you don't mind guiding me, I am pretty sure I'll be fine," Leon suggested lightly.

He didn't add that he had been missing the feel of Cloud's skin ever since they had shaken hands. Reaching out his hand, he found his fingers tips soon guided to Cloud's arm. The rest of Cloud wasn't as thin and bony as his hands, Leon soon found out. Though slender, Cloud's arms were well muscled beneath his thin cotton shirt. Leon leaned in a bit closer than usual and breathed in the masculine scent of him—like plain soap and something undefinable. He had to force himself to forget about the man beside him and pay more attention to where he was being led.

The building, Leon surmised, was massive. Judging from the echoing sounds of their footsteps once they were out of the bar itself, the place must have been some sort of industrial site. He could feel the cold concrete beneath his feet, and the walls must have been bare cinder-block to throw back that kind of sound. Cloud led Leon around a weaving path, so he assumed that they must use at least part of this area as some sort of storage. Leon soon heard the telltale clicking sound of a car being unlocked remotely, and knew they had reached their destination.

"I hate this fucking car," Cloud mumbled as he guided Leon to the door.

"What is it?" Leon asked as he settled into a particularly small passenger seat.

"A smart car," Cloud answered disgustedly. "I couldn't believe she traded in her truck for this damn thing."

"You don't have your own car?" Leon asked. He heard the driver's side door close and was felt his arm brush Cloud's.

Cloud was quite for a moment. "No. I should trade my bike in and get one. Not like I can ride it," he scoffed.

Leon nodded. "I can hear that you limp when you walk."

"Shell exploded right in front of me and blew my left leg off clean." Cloud cleared his throat uncomfortably. "So where do you live anyway?"

Leon gave him directions to his apartment building hoping that he wouldn't make the connection between himself and the florist. "Its the last building on the block with a red sign out front," he added recalling Yuffie's description.

The drive to his apartment was mostly silent. Cloud occasionally would mutter something about how much he hated other drivers, but didn't try to start any sort of conversation. Leon couldn't think of anything to say either. Ever since he had lost his sight, he found himself uncomfortable in cars. He didn't get motion sickness anymore, but it was just a bit disconcerting feeling himself moving through the void with no real bearing on where he was or how fast he was really going. Though he found the sensation wasn't as bad on the bus than it was in cars. Suddenly, he wondered if it was really such a great idea to take a ride from someone he didn't know. Hell, he didn't know if Cloud was a good driver or not.

"You okay?" Cloud asked as the car came to a stop.

"Fine," Leon lied. "Are we there already?"

"No just bottled up in a bit of traffic. We should be moving again soon," he assured him. "So I was wondering, do you know anything about the floral shop on your street?"

Leon sighed heavily. He could lie about it, but it probably wouldn't end well. "I do know Aerith. I was actually hoping that she was talking about some other guy named Cloud who works at a bar when I met you."

"She told you." There was an edge of anger on Cloud's voice that made Leon wince.

"I honestly hope you don't think I would try to interfere with whatever the hell is going on with you too," he said sternly.

"You don't seem like the kind of person who would do Aerith's dirty work," Cloud told him flatly.

Relaxing into the seat, Leon tried to ease away the nervousness he felt. Why did he care what Cloud thought? He'd just met the guy. Leon bit back the urge to call Aerith every name in the book. And why the hell did her bullshit drama have to effect his life? "For what it's worth," Leon began, "I told her to leave you alone."

Cloud let out a sarcastic laugh. "I keep nodding like you can see me."

Leon smiled. "It happens."

The car began moving again, and within a few minutes more, they were parked outside of Leon's apartment. "We're parked about dead center in front of the stairs," Cloud told him.

Leon thought for a second. "Illegally parked, I assume."

"Damn right. I dare any cop to try and write us a ticket. We can play the disabled vet card for all it's worth," Cloud joked.

It wasn't all that funny, but for some reason Leon couldn't stop laughing. There were much funnier cripple/blind guy jokes that he'd heard. In rehab, his roommate had quite the black sense of humor about their blindness, but Leon hadn't appreciated it then. Now, he couldn't help but imagine some poor cop trying to write them a fine. His ribs hurt by the time he was able to take a good breath again.

"I guess I should let you get back to work," Leon said regretfully.

"Yeah," Cloud agreed. "You should stop by again some time. I'm normally down in the bar by one so just knock."

"I will. And thanks again for everything."

After saying their goodbyes, Leon found himself standing on the curb listening to the car pull away. Part of him wished that he could have invited Cloud in, but then again it was probably better this way. He wasn't sure he should see Cloud again. Leon had a feeling that any more time with the bar owner could end very badly for him. After all, he had learned in the past that it was better to be alone than to let your heart get broken.

Leon was almost to the door before he heard the signature clomping run of Yuffie barreling his way. All at once, he remember the promise he had made the day earlier and his heart sank. He opened his mouth to say he was sorry, but he didn't have time get the words out as Yuffie collided into his chest. "Leon," she sobbed through shuddering breaths, "I was so worried!"

He wrapped his arms around the teen. "I am so sorry, kiddo. I missed my bus."

"I...I waited and you didn't get off the bus. I didn't know if something happened or if you were lost somewhere!" she wailed.

If anyone else would have said something like that, Leon would have been pissed but the teen had a special place in his heart, and he felt like an asshole for making her cry. Leon touched Yuffie's face gently and wiped away the tears. "Shh," he soothed softly. "I'm okay. I'm sorry I worried you.

The teen pulled away and punched him in the arm. "You big jerk!"

Leon smiled and rubbed his arm. "That all you got?"

A few minutes later, Leon and Yuffie were back in his apartment with her homework spread out on the kitchen table. The pair had made a deal a while back: in exchange for help with her schoolwork three nights a week, Yuffie helped Leon with his grocery shopping. Tonight's homework was geometry. Not Leon's strongest point, but he could certainly handle tenth grade level math.

"Leon?" Yuffie asked slyly after finishing a problem. "I saw that guy who dropped you off."

"And?" Leon scoffed.

Yuffie giggled. "He is so hot!"

Leon's only response was a snort of disgust. He had always known he would rue the day that Yuffie had figured out he was gay. He crossed his arms over his chest and tried his best to fix an icy glare in her direction. "And what does that have to do with Mrs. Lee's class?"

"What's his name?"

"Next problem," Leon demanded roughly. He had no desire to talk about Cloud with his teenage neighbor. Still, Leon had to push aside the niggling urge to ask Yuffie what Cloud looked like.

Yuffie reluctantly read the next problem, but then asked: "so is he your boyfriend?"

Leon groaned irritably. "His name's Cloud. I just met him today, and he is not my boyfriend. Drop it."

"That means you like him," she said in a sing-song voice. "How cute!"

Luckily, Yuffie soon bored of teasing him about his love life. The love triangle between some girls named Namine and Kairi and a boy named Roxas was way more fun to gossip about than he was. Leon half listened to the melodramatic tales of high school love as he munched on Oreos. He had never been so happy that Yuffie's conversation skills were manic as he was right now.

After finishing her homework, Yuffie rushed home to catch some television show that she proclaimed herself to be addicted to, and Leon settled onto the couch with a book on ancient naval warfare. His fingers moved across the page smoothly processing each word. Braille had not come easily for him. In his early lessons, Leon had become frustrated and wanted to give up. It had taken a verbal bitch slap from his instructor—a blind veteran from a previous war—for him to get serious. Now, not a day went by that he wasn't thankful for the ability to read again.

Leon had always been studious by nature. In high school, he had read just about every book the library had on military history and avionics. He wanted to be the one with all of the answers, and he didn't bother to be bashful about it. Leon was every bit as unpopular with the other students as he was popular with the teachers. Now that both his school and military days were behind him, Leon was once ravenous for reading material. One of his first trips out in Traverse Town was to find the public library. Thankfully, he was able to enlist the help of Yuna, the librarian to help him find some audio books and request braille copies of others.

Leon had been reading for quite a while when a gentle knock sounded at his door. "Who is it?" he called out before unlocking the door.

"Aerith."

"Shit," Leon murmured under his breath as he undid the bolt. He tried to paste on a smile, but wasn't really sure if he succeeded.

"You knew him all along, didn't you?" Aerith asked without preamble.

"Hello to you, too," he muttered as he held the door open for her.

"Don't play with me! God, you let me ramble on like you knew nothing!"

Leon shook his head. "Actually, I didn't know him until this afternoon. Which, by the way, I would have explained if you would have asked rather than just attacked."

"All I know, is that I was getting ready to deliver flowers for a wedding when I see you in a car with Cloud. What was I supposed to think, Leon?" she asked distraughtly.

"I don't know what you were supposed to think," he replied blandly. Leon didn't owe her anything, but somehow he found himself explaining the situation for her—sans a few more personal side notes.

Aerith breathed a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry. I never should have assumed, but with everything that's gone on with him..."

"Look, Aerith," he began as his patience ran thin, "I think you should go. I really don't want to be a part of whatever it is you think you need to find out from him. Hell, I don't even know the guy."

"Fair enough," Aerith replied softly. "Have a nice night."

"You too," Leon muttered.

He locked the door behind him and went to bed without any more thought about Cloud or Aerith. So much for escaping this little drama unscathed.


	5. Chapter 5

Please REVIEW! I can't improve without your help

Chapter 5

The weekend flew by for Cloud. They were busy enough that he didn't exactly have a lot of time to think about things. Tifa avoided him for the first half of the day Friday, but by the end of the night she was back to her usual self. Cloud did his best to be a bit friendlier than he had been. Logically, he knew that he shouldn't take out his frustrations on Tifa. She was only doing her best to help him through a rough time. That was why when she suggested breakfast on Sunday morning, he agreed.

Tifa took him to a little bakery/cafe on the edge of the cultural district. All it took was one deep breath of the fresh bread laden aroma to get Cloud's stomach growling. Since he had been home, his appetite had been lacking, but for some reason that morning he was just about ravenous. He ordered enough food to feed an army and devoured it in almost no time. Cloud considered ordering another cinnamon roll, but resisted.

With a giggle, Tifa slid half of her bearclaw onto his plate. "I haven't seen you eat that much since we were teenagers," she said with a content smile.

"You sure you don't want it?" he asked before tucking in.

Tifa shook her head. "I got full just watching you eat."

Cloud finished the bearclaw and leaned back in his seat. "I'm going to enjoy being off today," he murmured.

"Me too," Tifa agreed. "So any special plans for tonight? You know, a date maybe?"

"None," he told her flatly. "Why would you think I would be going out?"

"No reason. I just thought you seemed to like that guy you drove home the other day," she admitted. "I know it hasn't been that long, but have you considered dating again?"

Cloud sighed. He hadn't really given dating much thought. There was just too much wrong with his life—with him—to expect to bring someone else in on it. How could he ask someone to try and be with him after they saw how ruined his body was? And how could he just move on after Zack? To top it all off, there was a complication that he and Tifa rarely talked about. No, dating wasn't a good idea.

Shoving aside the thoughts, Cloud shrugged. "Maybe someday. What about you and Axel?"

At the mention of the red haired man, Tifa's cheeks went pink. "Me and Axel? You must be joking. He's just a kid."

Cloud smirked. "Not even old enough to drink, but still old enough to be legal."

"He'll be twenty-one soon," Tifa grumbled defensively. Then she frowned. "I must look ridiculous for flirting with him."

"You're only twenty-six. You're hardly a cougar," Cloud assured her. "Axel doesn't seem to mind."

The waiter brought the check, and Cloud snatched it before Tifa had a chance. The pair strolled outside and down the street browsing the shop windows as they passed. It felt almost eerily like it had been so long ago. Tifa pointed out all kinds of things that would look good on him, and he refused to even try them on. Instead, he pointed out lingerie and bikinis for Tifa. Cloud couldn't help but smile as they walked. He felt like himself again. That kind of moment was rare, and he savored it until they made it back to Tifa's car. As Tifa climbed in, Cloud decided that he wasn't quite ready to go back yet. He said goodbye and made his way farther on down the street.

There was a small pocket of delis, butcher shops, and grocers at the heart of the cultural district. On the weekends, farmers would drive in and set up stands along the sidewalk. Some even just sold their produce out of the back of their trucks. The crowd was larger that day than it had been the few other times Cloud had made it down this far. He found himself enjoying the bustling strangers along side him. After a while, his hip began to ache and he bought a coffee and roll from one of the shops before finding an empty bench. He sipped his coffee as he commenced his people watching.

Before too long, Cloud spotted a familiar brunette walking down the street guided by a teenage girl dressed in a green shirt. Cloud thought he recognized her as the girl who had about knocked Leon over the other day when he got out of the car. He swallowed hard and debated whether or not he should go say hello. Just as he decided to stay put, the teenager spotted him. She said something to Leon and then about dragged the blind man over to the bench.

Cloud stood up as the pair made it over. "Hello, Leon," he said uneasily.

Leon smiled. "Hi. Sorry to intrude on your peace, but Yuffie insisted we come over to see you."

"I don't mind," Cloud told him hastily. He held out his hand to the teen. "I'm Cloud."

The teen blushed and took his hand. "Yuffie," she replied. "So you're all alone here today?"

"I went to breakfast with a friend, but then I decided to enjoy the good weather while it lasts. I might as well enjoy my day off," he explained. "What about you two? Did you come for the farm market?"

Leon nodded. "I like to pick up a few things while their here. Yuffie helps me do my grocery shopping."

The teen cocked her head to the side suddenly. "I just forgot! Dad needed me to do something really important," she lied. She looked from one man to the other and then grinned sly at Cloud. "I've gotta go. I'm sure Cloud can help you out." Without another word, she turned and took off running down the street.

Leon reached out his hand for her in vain. "Yuffie! Hey Yuffie, wait!" he cried out in dismay. "Damn it! I am so sorry, Cloud. I really had no idea she was going to do that."

Cloud couldn't help it, he laughed. "No problem. I think she was trying to help."

"Trying to help by taking off?" Leon snorted. "I guess I'll just go shopping another day."

"I'll go with you," Cloud offered. In all honesty, he couldn't think of a better way to spend his day. There was just something about the guy that he just liked.

"You've done enough for me already. And like you said, it's your day off, you should enjoy it," Leon argued. "I've got enough in my fridge to last me a couple of days."

"I want to," Cloud assured him firmly. "I need to get out every so often. I've been collecting dust for months now."

Leon smiled and held out his arm. "All right then. Lead on, kind sir."

Cloud chuckled. As Leon's hand found his arm, Cloud was greeted by the wonderful feeling of Leon so very close. He had noticed it when he lead Leon through the garage, but had easily dismissed it. This time however, Cloud was forced to acknowledge the butterflies in the pit of his stomach. He felt like a criminal, stealing looks at a man who would never know.

The shopping trip was actually quite enjoyable. Cloud lead Leon along the sidewalk telling him what kind of shops and stands they were passing along the way. Cloud couldn't help but admire the way Leon picked his fruit and vegetables by smelling them. He supposed that was common enough by any standards, but there was just something about the way that Leon closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He would smile triumphantly when he found a good one of whatever he was looking for and put it in his bag. That smile made Cloud want to kiss him, but Cloud was very aware of his limits. By the time they were nearly done, Cloud's stomach was growling again and it was nearly one o'clock. Leon suggested a little deli at the end of the block and Cloud was more than happy to find a reason to prolong his time with Leon.

The deli that Leon had picked was a little family run business. There was a modest line and they took there place. Again Leon was taking deep breaths with that smile of his in place. "I swear I could find this place with my nose alone," he muttered happily.

"I take it you come here often?" Cloud asked.

Leon nodded. "Almost every week. Everything here is amazing. Trust me, as soon as you taste it you'll be a regular too."

Cloud had to bite his tongue to stop him from telling Leon that he would be a regular if it meant he got to see Leon every week. Instead, he asked: "well, then what should I get?"

"What specials are on the board?" Leon asked thoughtfully. Cloud read him the offerings. "Oh, definitely get the pastrami on rye."

As they approached the counter, a small old woman stepped up on to a stool to see them. She smiled knowingly at the pair. "Good to see you, Leon," she said with a twinkle in her eyes. "And with such a handsome young man!"

Cloud squirmed uncomfortably at the woman's comment, but Leon chuckled. "I'll have to take your word for it, Mrs. Deltora. I was telling Cloud that your pastrami is to die for."

"It sure is," she beamed.

A few minutes later, they were seated at at tiny table with two of the aforementioned offerings in front of them. Leon unwrapped his and took a big bite. He moaned his appreciation, and Cloud had to struggle against the wave of lust that washed over him. In his mind's eye, he could picture all kinds of ways to illict those same sounds from Leon.

Leon's hands stopped mid-air still holding the sandwich, and he cocked his head. "Not hungry?"

"Sorry. I just got lost in thought for a moment," Cloud muttered as he reached for his sandwich.

The pair ate in companionable silence. Cloud's eyes kept drifting toward Leon. He wondered why the blind man was the one to bring back his lust. Oh, Cloud had certainly had the physical urges to fuck, but he hadn't thought of anyone at all as he'd dealt with it on his own. It new and alarming to thing that even now—knowing that absolutely nothing could come of it—he could want someone as bad as he wanted Leon. He wondered what Leon would say if he could read his mind.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Leon couldn't stop himself from smiling. It had been a long time since he'd spent time with someone like this. Not since his days as a cadet, in fact. Cloud was warm and funny and just so damned awkward that Leon couldn't help it. It was like he was hyper-aware when Cloud was near. Every scent, sound, and touch was magnified to the point that just the simple brush of Clouds skin against his was enough to make Leon shiver. He shouldn't be enjoying this so much, but couldn't help himself

As they walked down the street, Leon noticed that Cloud's limp was becoming more and more pronounced. Every so often, he would even hear Cloud take a sharp breath like he were in real pain. Leon pretended he didn't notice. He knew that if he simply asked Cloud about it, that it would more than likely upset him. Instead, Leon opened the face of his watch and felt the hands.

"I've taken up your whole day," he murmured with a slight frown.

"I don't mind," Cloud told him softly. "I just hope you don't mind having to spend the day with me. I know I'm probably a poor substitute." 

If almost anyone else had said something like that, Leon would have thought they were fishing for a compliment. That wasn't Cloud's style. There was just something about the former soldier that made Leon want to protect him. A ludicrous idea, given Leon's past failures, but one that the he couldn't ignore. It sparked something inside of him that Leon had thought long-since dead. In one swift moment, Leon made a choice that would alter things between them.

"Actually," Leon began, "I was hoping you'd join me for dinner."

Cloud stopped suddenly almost tripping the both of them. "I..I would hate to impose."

"Imposing, my ass," Leon grumbled. "I asked you, remember?"

"Sounds great," Cloud answered finally.

Leon smiled. "All right then. Why don't we get a cab and head to my place?"

Taxi cabs weren't on Leon's list of favorite things. First of all, because he didn't like car rides. Secondly, he never could get past the smell of cheap, pine air freshener. However the main reason he didn't like cabs was because when he first came to Traverse Town, a driver had ripped him off. Not knowing the area or the typical fare rates, Leon had paid nearly triple for a ride and not realized it until he had taken his second trip to the same area with an honest cabbie. When he'd figured out that he'd been taken advantage of, he had felt like a helpless fool. Reminding himself that the cab was for Cloud's benefit, Leon slid into the backseat, and tried not to breath too much of the foul air in.

"You really don't like riding in cars, do you?" Cloud commented a moment after they had started moving.

"Not particularly." Leon shrugged. "I don't like not being in control when I travel." 

"Fair enough. We could have walked back, if you wanted."

"Even I can see how much pain you're in."

"It's not so bad," the younger man lied defiantly.

Leon sighed and idly twirled his folded cane. He wasn't about to argue the fact. Cloud's pride wasn't going to allow him to admit defeat just yet, and it was a lesson he was going to have to face on his own. Leon knew from experience that all of the wisdom in the world wouldn't mean anything until Cloud faced one big truth: he was disabled. There were going to be times when he realized that things just weren't the same—no matter how delicately he danced around the issue. Also, 'help' wasn't always a bad thing. But Leon wasn't going to waste his time telling Cloud what he didn't want to hear. Instead, he tried to relax for the rest of the ride.

The pair carried Leon's groceries up to his apartment. Cloud took a seat on the couch while Leon went about putting things away. It was usually easier if Leon did it on his own. He knew down to the inch where everything should go. Yuffie had tried to help him once but had only turned his kitchen to chaos. As he worked, he listened for sounds of Cloud moving around in the living room, but heard none.

"What's on your mind?" he asked as he put some carrots in the fresher.

Cloud let out a loud sigh. "I still get frustrated," he admitted. "I'm not like you. I don't have everything under control."

"You think I have everything under control?" Leon asked with incredulous laugh.

"You seem so okay with things."

Cocking his head to the side, Leon thought for a moment. "I guess that I am. It's not like either of us really have a choice. My eyes aren't going to get any better, and I doubt you'll regrow a leg. I wasn't exactly accepting of the changes in my life, and that was something I had to deal with one step at time. Then one day, I realized that I had the skills it took to make a life of my own. You have those too, you know."

"That's not it, not exactly," Cloud replied. "My left hip was shattered and there is almost nothing left of my leg. At first, it was questionable whether I would walk again, and then they told me that the pain would be too bad for me to really use my prosthetic on a daily basis. Some days...some days, I..."

"Some days, you think they were right," Leon finished for him.

"I do. Logically, I know that with the chair or the crutches I can get around much easier and without the agony. But then I see how people look at me. It's like I'm wearing a sign that says 'I'm broken.' So, I push through, and then the pain comes," the younger man said with a note of desperation in his voice.

Leon knew that desperation all too well. It was the same feeling he'd had the first time he'd used the cane in public. He didn't have to see the way people looked at him to know the kind of pitying stares he was receiving. The need to feel normal again had cut so deep that it felt like his bones were aching. But then, Leon had adjusted his idea of normal. His scars and his blindness were parts of him—ones that he didn't particularly like, but inseparable from the rest of him just the same. Pushing aside the memories, Leon made his was to the couch, and settled in beside Cloud.

"You're tearing yourself apart," he said softly. "I wish I could tell you some grand secret that will make it all go away, Cloud, but I can't. All I can tell you is that you need to stop letting what people think keep you from living. " To illustrate his point, Leon touched the scarred side of his face. "If I let how people look at this effect me, I'd never leave the damn house"

Cloud didn't answer right away, but Leon feel him moving beside him. Before he could react to just how close his friend had gotten, Leon felt slightly calloused fingertips on his cheek. The blind man's breath caught in his throat.

"Even with them, you are beautiful," Cloud told him softly.

Leon frowned. "You don't have to sugar-coat things."

"No, I'm not," he insisted. "If you look just at the scars, it's pretty bad. But when I look at all of you... When I see you, I... I think of things that would probably make you want to run as fast and as far as you can. I think you're beautiful."

"Thank you," Leon said forcing the words past the knot in his throat.

His curiosity was almost killing him. More than anything, he wanted to see Cloud for himself, to confirm what everyone had already told him. His hands found their way to Cloud's shoulders, and he let himself give into the urge to "see" what the man looked like. Leon's touch revealed delicately formed features accented by full lips and arching brows. Moving upward, his fingers met soft hair that was meticulously sculpted with a slightly stiff hair product.

"What color is your hair?"

"Blond. And my eyes are blue," Cloud supplied.

Smiling, Leon let his mind's eye fill in the gaps. Cloud had said that he was beautiful, but probably didn't realize that he himself was the definition of the word. His hands ached to touch more. It was like Cloud was a drug that he just couldn't get enough of. It was a dangerous path to tread, but Leon was already too far along to care. He could feel Cloud's breath on his face, and before he could stop himself, he closed the space between them.

When their lips met, it was like they melted into one another. The kiss was so perfectly natural, like it had simply meant to be. Leon's body reacted like a sleeping tiger that had just been awakened. He felt so alive as his lips and tongue found their mates. Cloud's kiss was everything that he had dreamed of and feared at the same time. His hands roamed the strong, slender body against him, making him want more. Before his touch moved too far down, Leon managed to right himself and pull away.

"If your thoughts are anything like mine, I'm certainly not running away," Leon teased huskily.

Cloud chuckled. "Crazy as it sounds, I would almost say that you've been thinking the same thing."

"Not crazy at all," Leon murmured with his head still spinning slightly. He wanted to kiss him again, but wouldn't press his luck.

"Still, we shouldn't have done that," Cloud sighed. "I barely know you and here I am dumping my problems on you one moment and lusting after you the next."

"You needed to let it out," Leon assured him seriously. He took a deep breath. "And if you're not ready for more than friendship, I understand that too."

Cloud let out a sarcastic snort. "I don't even really know what 'ready' feels like. I want this, but I know I don't deserve it. There was someone I loved before, but he didn't come back from the war. He died trying to save me."

"I know how you feel. There were people that I should have protected. People who died because I didn't see the big picture," Leon told him slowly. It was the first time that he'd allowed himself to say the words aloud. "I disobeyed a direct order not to engage the enemy before reinforcements were in the air, and watched Radiant Gardens go up in flames while I tried to desperately to regroup with the squadron. I was too cocky to see my mistake until it was too late. Not an hour later, my plane went down in flames."

"You've never told anyone about it before, have you?"

"No. And that's why I told Aerith to leave you alone. We all have our secrets to keep." Leon bit his lip and turned away. "Now that you know, you've probably changed your mind, but I'm still not sorry that I told you."

Cloud squeezed Leon's hand. "I didn't change my mind. And I read the reports from Radiant Gardens. No matter how great of a pilot you were, Leon, you couldn't have won that battle. You were out numbered twenty-to-one, and they took out your communications tower. It was over before it began."

"It was, but I keep asking myself: what if I could have saved just one life?"

"I know I couldn't have saved Zach," Cloud admitted. "But he would have lived if he'd have just let me die. He would have come home, married Aerith, and probably had a good life. He should have left me there. I was dead weight, and the rest of the platoon needed to move fast. Zack had just finished tying a tourniquet on my leg when he was shot through the heart."

Leon's mouth went dry. Now, everything made sense. "Someone in the war office knew about the two of you."

"They knew that Zach was having a relationship with a subordinate, but they didn't know who. He had received word that the major wanted to see him once we made it back to camp, but..." Cloud's voice trailed off. He didn't need to finish it. Leon already knew.

"It wasn't your fault," Leon told him honestly.

"And you couldn't have saved Radiant Gardens," Cloud added. "Maybe that's why fate put us together."

"Maybe." Leon smiled, and traced Cloud's fingertips with his own. "There is just something about you that I can't resist."

"Give it time. I'm sure you'll find plenty of things you can't stand about me," Cloud replied wryly.

The pair settled into a companionable silence as they made dinner. Leon listened to the rhythmic sounds of Cloud chopping up some vegetables as he went about trimming a couple of chicken breasts to be grilled. He'd found out he actually liked cooking during rehab, but cooking with a certain someone was even better. He took more care with what he was doing knowing that he had Cloud to share the meal with. As he pulled the grill pan out of the drawer, he could almost feel a pair of eyes on him.

"Penny for your thoughts?" he asked, assuming that Cloud—much like Aerith and most others—was about to comment on how he did things. The idea annoyed him, but not too much.

"Just enjoying this."

Leon let out an almost inaudible sigh of relief. "Hopefully, we'll do this more than just once."

"I would invite you to my place and cook for you, but I think you have just seen the full range of my culinary skills," Cloud said sheepishly with a laugh. "These veggies aren't exactly cut evenly."

"You're a frozen pizza kind of guy?" Leon guessed.

"No, I am a 'go downstairs and have the cook make me something' kind of guy. There are advantages to owning a bar that serves fairly good food."

Leon shook his head and chuckled. "Maybe a few lessons will help."

"I think there are other things I would rather do when you're around," Cloud told him seductively. There was the sound of the chair scraping against the floor a scant moment before a pair of lips found their way to Leon's neck.

"You're going to drive me crazy!" Leon cried as Cloud nibbled on his ear.

"And we'll both enjoy it." Cloud's breath against his skin sent a wave of desire that went the whole way down to Leon's toes.

Before Leon could react or reply, he heard the telltale sound of a key in the door. He opened his mouth to warn Cloud about the incoming visitor, but didn't quite make it. The door opened, and he heard Yuffie's surprised squeak as the men attempted to disentangle themselves.

"OHMYGOD! ISOTOTALLYKNEWIT! YOUGUYSARETOTALLYLIKE—GAH!" Yuffie burst out sans pauses. By the time she was done gushing, she was gasping for breath, and Leon's face felt like it was on fire. He knew that there would be no living this down—ever.

"What have I told you about knocking?" he grumbled.

"Knocking?" she cried. "Seriously? I set you up with your blond dream boat and you are all concerned about knocking? Anyway, I will let you two get back to it."

The hyperactive teen didn't bother to say goodbye on her way out. True to form, she slammed the door, and Leon heard her skipping down the hall. He groaned, and turned toward the direction Cloud had pulled away. "I am so sorry about this."

He had expected Cloud to be upset or embarrassed, but instead his companion began laughing out loud. "No worries. It's been the most interesting day I have had in a long time," he assured him once his laughter had subsided.

"In that case," Leon murmured wolfishly: "Where were we?"


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

It all started rather unintentionally. Cloud's apartment had felt a bit too stuffy that afternoon, and he opened a window to let in a bit of air. The second his fingers lifted the frame, he heard the pathetic sounds of a motor spitting and sputtering. He almost immediately spotted Axel limping his well-beaten street bike into the lot behind the bar. His first instinct was to slam the window shut and pretend that he wasn't almost positive he knew what was wrong with the thing just from the sound, but instead he watched the younger man probing at the bike. Axel wasn't a mechanic—that much was damn sure. The kid was idly touching parts of the engine that had nothing to do with the problem. He didn't have a clue how to fix the bike, but Cloud did. Before Cloud realized what he was doing, he found himself standing in the alley a few feet away.

Axel peered up at him from where he was crouched. "Hey," he said distractedly.

"It sounds like a problem with an intake valve," Cloud blurted out without pleasantries.

"An intake valve?" the redhead repeated with a frown.

Cloud nodded. "Walk it around the corner. I'll open the garage and take a look."

"You don't have to worry about it. I'll take it to the garage down the street from my place tomorrow," he declined uncomfortably. "It's not your headache."

Letting out a sarcastic snort, Cloud shook his head. It sounded a bit like himself, he had to admit. For the last year, he had been telling people that his pain wasn't their problem, slapping away at helping hands. Pride had pushed away the world around him, and now no one wanted _his_ help. It just sounded so childish.

"Don't be stupid," Cloud grumbled. "I have the time, the tools, and maybe even the parts you need."

"I can't pay you," Axel told him, looking away.

"So pick up an extra shift or two behind the bar. A night or two off might be worth it to me ."

At first, Cloud thought that Axel was going to refuse again, but without another word he wheeled his bike toward the garage.

The back corner of the immense structure had originally been intended for Cloud to set up a small shop. When Tifa bought the place, he could remember how excited she'd been. They'd start their own little entrepreneurial empire under one roof—or at least that had been the plan. The day Cloud came home, he asked her to throw some sheets over top of all his equipment and cover his bike. He didn't want to look at any of it. In the time he'd been home, he'd not touched one damn thing back there. But as he tossed off the dust covered sheets from his tool chest and work bench, a pang of nostalgia hit him in the gut so hard it almost knocked him on his ass. The weight of the tools in his hands felt so natural that he suddenly seemed a lot more whole than he had in a long time.

"If you don't feel like doing it, you don't have to," Axel said, tearing him out of his thoughts.

Cloud blinked and stared at him for a second before realizing how he must have looked. "No, I want to."

It didn't take long for Cloud's experienced hands to start dismantling the bike's engine. Axel's hovering presence annoyed him, so he sent the kid inside to open the bar and kitchen with Tifa. Once he was alone, Cloud let himself get lost in the simple joy of his work. Engines weren't like people; they made sense. Each part fit perfectly together to work toward the goal of providing horsepower and torque. Still a well-built motorcycle was more than just that. There was an artistry to it all.

He could still remember the first time he'd seen a custom chopper. He had been at a car show with his father—not long before his old man had died, actually—and there had been a row of shiny, motorcycles sitting along the back corner away from the hot-rods. The one that still stuck out in his mind had been dark purple, with green and yellow flames licking at the gas tank and front fender. It's owner spotted the kid looking and revved the engine. Young Cloud had covered his ears from the deafening roar, but he'd also fallen in love. It amazed him that something could be both so beautiful and powerful at the same time. From then on, he'd been hooked. He bought his first broken down hunk of rust and bolts when he was fifteen and spent over a year bringing the old girl back to life. At seventeen, he'd started work on Fenrir under the guidance of Tifa's father. He'd learned it all—metal working, welding, engine building, transmissions, and painting—and put every bit of it to practice on the work of art and sweat sitting not a full ten yards away from him. Part of him longed to strip off the cover and just stare at it to confirm that the bike wasn't just a figment of his dreams, but he knew that see it again would only make him ache for things he couldn't have anymore.

Somewhere along the line, Cloud lost track of time. He hadn't given much pause to how long he'd actually been working until he heard the door open behind him. Tifa led Leon through the maze of boxes and junk to where Cloud was working. Cursing under his breath, he struggled to his feet and wiped his hands on his already dirty jeans.

How the hell he'd forgotten about his "date" with Leon, he'd never know. After their day together, the pair hadn't managed to see each other again for a few days. They each worked opposite schedules, making planning anything nearly impossible. Finally, Cloud managed to talk Tifa into bringing in some extra help for the night to give them an evening out together. Though he knew telling Tifa about his feelings for Leon would have made a night off an instantly granted request, he didn't want to open up too much about what was going on. I had been hard enough to wrap his own head around the idea. For the last four days, Cloud had been dying to see Leon, so forgetting about him was no easy feat.

"Shit," he said roughly. "I was a little distracted."

"It's all right," Leon chuckled. "I think you passed a 'little' about an hour ago. Tifa gave me a tour of the bar," he said lightly.

Cloud's cheeks burned with embarrassment, and he wasn't blind to the way Tifa was staring at him. "I should have been helping you guys with the open," he said to her sheepishly.

"Oh, no not at all. Axel did everything already. I think he is just more than happy to be getting the bike fixed," she rambled. He didn't miss the tightness in her voice, nor the shimmer of tears in her eyes. Finally, she looked to bike—now mostly reassembled. "It's good to see you back at it."

"This is a one time thing," he told her flatly. Immediately, he regretted his harhness, and instead changed topics. "Thanks for keeping Leon company."

"Anytime," she said, taking the hint. "I'll just get back to work."

Leon murmured a goodbye to Tifa, but then frowned. "A one time thing? I thought if you could do anything, you would open your own shop?" 

"Things are complicated," Cloud answered evasively. It wasn't something he wanted to talk about. "And again, I'm sorry for forgetting."

"I understand," Leon told him with a shrug. "Tifa told me that you used to forget to eat or sleep when you were really into your work. I suppose forgetting a date isn't to far fetched that I should take it personally."

Cloud's cheeks were bright red with discomfort. "I haven't touched an engine in a very long time. I got caught up."

"Did it feel good?"

"Better than it should," he admitted.

Leon smiled and took a few tentative steps toward him. "I'm not going to run into anything am I?"

"You're in the only clear path in the whole damn garage."

"Good."

Before Cloud realized his intent, Leon reached out and kissed him lightly. Leaning in, the blond circled his arms around the other man's waist and deepened the kiss.

"I had hoped this all wasn't a delusion of my lonely brain," Cloud quipped.

"Definitely not...that is, unless I am crazy, too," Leon assured. "And I've never known any of my imaginary friends to smell like engine grease."

"Sorry. I'll go get a quick shower before we go out," he promised sheepishly.

The blind man just shook his head. "Take your time. I am even okay if you just want to order in."

Cloud sighed. "I'm horrible at this whole dating thing. I've never really done much of it."

"Me either, so I guess the good news is that I don't have a whole lot of grandiose expectations. I'd just like to spend time with you," Leon replied. He squeezed Cloud's shoulder. "Besides, I am still curious about the bike Tifa was telling me about. Fender?"

"Fenrir," Cloud corrected him. "It's just collecting dust these days. Nothing too interesting."

"Can I see it?"

Cloud was tempted to say no. He didn't want to see Fenrir, let alone show it to Leon. Part of him wanted to keep the bike hidden. It was just easier to pretend that the thing didn't exist, but then again, if anyone would understand, it would be Leon. "All right," Cloud agreed after a moment.

He led Leon to where the bike stood and pulled off the cover in one quick motion—like pulling off a band-aid. Cloud's heart caught in his throat as he stared at the black-pearl painted machine. The chrome shining back at him hadn't dimmed in his memory one bit, but to actually see it, brought about an ache so profound that he almost was tempted to cover it again. Before he lost his nerve, he guided Leon's hands to the seat. He watched as the blind man's fingertips traced from one end to the other.

Leon smiled at him. Cloud expected him to ask what color the bike was, but he didn't. "It's beautiful," he declared, instead.

"Thanks," Cloud replied tightly. "I was so damned proud of it when I finished it."

"And you aren't now?"

"I don't know. It just seems kind of stupid for me to keep it."

Leon frowned. "Why?"

The blond sighed heavily and forced himself to answer. "Because I can't ride it."

Thankfully, Leon didn't disagree or give him any sort of hopeful bullshit reply. He simply nodded and grasped the edge of the sheet at his feet, pulling it back over the bike.

"I'll show you my apartment and take a quick shower, if that's okay with you," Cloud said awkwardly. "We can decide how we want to spend the rest of our night from there."

"Sounds good."


End file.
